Can’t Lose for Winning

CITY OF CHAMPIONS – I go out a lot with my cousin.  It has a weird effect on guys (“OH!!!! COUSINS!!” they exclaim as the drooling commences), I guess along the lines of sisters or twins (which is just gross, guys.  Come on.  What is hot about incest??).  Anyway, one particular eveneing we decided to get some after work drinks at the Beacon Hill Pub (the BPH).  It’s a dive bar near, and the clientele varies from urban hipsters to sketchy locals.  On this night, the place was mostly filled with the latter, but it didn’t really matter to us, we were just out for the beers.  We were sitting at one of those thin tables that come out of the wall.  There was a mirror running along the length of the wall…typical bar stuff.  We sat drinkin our frosty cold beverages when this sly old guy made his way over to us.  And I don’t mean old like kind of old.  I mean like grandpa old.  So he sidled up to us and started in on his dirty old man flirtation.  “Do you want to see the prettiest four girls in the room?”  At this point we were trying to humor him and look baffled as he slowly counted “One…two,” pointing at me and my cousin, “Three…four,” pointint at our reflection in the mirror.  We still thought he was kind of harmless so we laughed.  He kept going with these sorts of bad jokes and we continues to humor him…to a point.  Eventually, he discovered that we were cousins, and then he broke out with this: “Oh!  Hey!  Do you know what comes out of an ant hole?”  We shook our heads.  “The uncle and the occasional cousin!”  We were so grossed out that we finished our beers and left.